In this issue:Signature scents • Facing phobias • Crime fiction • Cook for friends • How to be a lawyer • Learn tai chi • Puzzles, colouring and more!
How would you feel if a friend called you selfish? Annoyed? Upset? Outraged? But does it always have to be a bad thing? What if selfishness was due a bit of a makeover?
Ever since you were born, you’ve probably been told that selfishness is to be avoided, while its opposite, kindness, is something to strive for. But all of this focus on kindness can make you feel as if it’s wrong to put yourself first, even when that might be the right thing to do. Kindness is vital, because it brings people together. If no one was kind, society would quickly fall apart. Giving has been shown to make people happier, and it’s deeply rooted in human nature. But if you never put yourself first, that can be bad too.
Rather than selfishness, think of it as kindness towards yourself. If you’ve been studying hard for an exam, or spending every evening and weekend doing sport or homework, taking some time out, just for you, is important to redress the balance. If you’ve been helping a friend through a difficult time, listening to their troubles and offering your support, don’t forget to turn a little of that compassion inwards.
‘No act of kindness, however small, is ever wasted.’ So said the ancient Greek author, Aesop. And that goes for showing it to yourself, too.